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Today I am feeling blue. I think part of it is the "post-vacation" blues ... I always miss my dear friend more after I have had the opportunity to spend face-to-face time with her. The other thing that happened is my husband and I ran into his son (my step-son) at Wal-Mart on Sunday. We have not seen him or talked to him in almost 2 years. It is a long story but suffice it to say he has hurt us deeply, betrayed us, used us with the end result being that we have a grand-daughter who is 6 years old now that we no longer see because of his choices in life. The conversation was okay but it has stirred emotions in me and really has stirred up stuff for my dear husband. Our son said he wanted to call and come see us. But there was no acknowledgment from him to indicate sorrow or regret for the position he put us in. It stirs anger and brings up all the betrayals of the past. So, now my DH has to fight hard to stay out of his "dark place" and I of course worry about my DH. I don't think we are ready to have him at our home. I'm not sure my DH is even ready to speak to him. So that is weighing heavy on my mind and heart.
Then, I know this is silly but every day the scale has gone up 2 tenths of a pound. I know I should not let this bother me and I have said repeatedly that I WILL respect where my body decides to settle but I am not happy with it. I also know that the scale is imperfect and there are many reasons for fluctuations, including being stressed I think. I'm wearing size 12 capris. What am I complaining for? Oh, probably because I'm tired and stressed and worried that my DH will slip back into depression and I feel helpless. So, you can see why I picked blue today. The good news is that we are talking about it and he is very aware of being on a slippery slope. That is different than in the past.
Eating and exercise wise I am very much on track so I'm not sure there is anything different I should be doing. Maybe more calories. But of course that makes me nervous. I'll see how the week goes .... maybe try to get to bed early. I don't know. I know this will pass. So, in the mean time I will have myself some coffee and a fiber bar and focus on "other people's problems"!! LOL!! That always helps me!! Helps me put my own struggles in perspective. Reminds me of how much I have. How much there is to be grateful for. And I know, I really do know in my heart that I am just fine.
Thanks for listening, once again. Have a good day, may only warm, wonderful, positive comments come your way today!!
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1410 kcal
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Rasva: 43,32g | Prot: 92,07g | Hh: 181,96g.
Aamiainen: medifast cocoa, water. Lounas: Hillshire Farms Turkey, Yoplait Light Thick & Creamy Key Lime, Whole Wheat English Muffin, pineapple tidbits, 2% cottage cheese. Päivällinen: Shrimp, avocado, lettuce, Newman's Balsamic Dressing, sunflower seeds no shell, feta, tomato, Craisins, apple, perrier. Välipalat/Muut: Fuze, Fiber One Oats & Caramel. lisää...
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3073 kcal
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Harjoitus:
Nukkuminen - 8 tuntia, Lepo - 4 tuntia ja 18 minuuttia, Toimistotyö - 8 tuntia ja 56 minuuttia, Ajaminen - 2 tuntia, Precor Elliptical - 46 minuuttia. lisää...
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