Päiväkirja - Ruhu

Profiili - Ruhu | Painohistoria

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04 lokakuuta 2014

I'm once again overwhelmed… but in a wonderful way, from all the love & support you all so willingly give! I'm in a much better place today, and so very grateful for each of you! Plus, I truly have a wonderful life & I can't lose sight of all I'm blessed with -- a loving DH and a good marriage (not perfect, but truly wonderful in many ways), being a mom to 2 amazing sons with whom I have great relationships and who willingly & easily give & receive love, close extended family - both my own and my in-laws who have taken me in as their own, 2 great pets, a beautiful home, and good health & enough wealth to truly live a life I love.

Yes, I struggle with eating and a disordered eating past. But I also can't lose sight of how far I've come away from that past and toward healthier & happier ways. As I realized at some point yesterday, even though I still overeat at times mindlessly, I'm doing so on healthier foods for the most part and without the obsession afterwards to get rid of the extra calories I'd consumed. While I know I still want to work toward restricting less as I still do to compensate for episodes of overeating, I'm on a journey, my own journey, and can only proceed at a pace that works for me.

So, I'll take this one day and each of its one meals, moments, bites, thoughts & emotions as they come, and I'll pray, breathe, journal, stay curious and express my way on my journey toward healthier & happier living and eating. xoxox

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

(6 kommenttia)

03 lokakuuta 2014

TGIF to all. Please bear with me as I am struggling again to get back to my healthy, happy, mindful eating & living highway. I know you all have been there and feel your love & support! I'm sorting through what's going on with me & will be back with a full lab report as soon as I can. Until then, I'll be praying, breathing, staying curious, journaling & expressing my way as best I can through this one day and each one meal, bite, thought, and emotion. xoxox

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

(7 kommenttia)

02 lokakuuta 2014

You all are just so, so, so awesome! And again I am dumbstruck at the outpouring of love & support you give me & so many here. I am truly blessed to have this special place and each of you… thanks for the kind remarks yesterday and for being you!

So, I'm formulating my next experiment with a nickname something along the lines of Operation No More Tripping Up for when I return from a trip. My health coach & I brainstormed some ideas for what to try next as I am determined to change that long-standing habit of snacking when returning home from a trip, which begins as I unpack my suitcase and ends with whatever sweet treats I have on hand. So, stay tuned as the lab coat re-emerges. I leave again a week from tomorrow, so have ample time to construct the next plan, and several more trips coming on which to progress (not perfect) it.

I again slept extremely well last night -- 8 hours -- and woke just in time to get my butt up and off to my 7 am HIIT workout. I'm still playing catch up here, but will squeeze in a mani/pedi this afternoon. So, off I'll go, but not without starting in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious and express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of amazing you, my family & IRL friends, feeling great and so well rested again and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(8 kommenttia)

01 lokakuuta 2014

I'm baaaaaaaack! And had a wondeful, fun-filled visit with DS and many great memories again of our time together. Plus I'll see him again in Nashville in 10 days as DH & I go there to celebrate my friend from home's DH's 60th birthday, and DS will be there for Vanderbilt's homecoming. So, saying goodbye wasn't as tough knowing it wouldn't be long before we will be together again. What was hard… well…first

The Good -- ATF (all things food) & ATL (all things living) were good while we were in SC. I stayed my course most of the time, got to daily workouts, felt good, slept pretty well and was able to truly enjoy every minute there!

The Bad -- Our flight home on Mon morning at 6:30 am required a 4 am wake-up call which would have been fine had it not been followed by 3 flight delays and finally a cancelation requiring us to re-route through ATL (Atlanta) and get home 8 hours after originally planned. I felt so good as I worked through the frustration which was made even worse as DH had needed to get back for 2 important meetings that he needed to do on the phone instead between flights. I took that time to be an airport terminal walker and perused the shops. And I amused myself by reminding myself how far I'd come from my disordered eating past when airports were the start of my sugar eating for trips back home as I used sugar to deal with the sadness that leaving always brings. I instead found healthy options for both breakfast & lunch setting myself up for the healthy return I was working toward.

The Ugly -- Once again upon getting home after a stressful day which wasn't over yet as DH needed to turn things around quickly to catch a ride with co-workers to drive to Boston for the night and an early morning meeting there. Tension built at home as he re-packed, couldn't find things, left without his cell phone & needed me to drive it to meet them as they turned around to retrieve it. While he wasn't frustrated with me, the tension still impacted me and I let it detour me toward snacking and once again getting into those foods that I know do not agree with me… the worst impact being that I again didn't sleep and yesterday's fatigue convinced me I was hungry at times I was truly just tired.

But, today is a new day and after a good night's sleep, I'm back committed to my healthy eating & living ways… one day or meal or bite at a time until I feel truly in the saddle again! And knowing that you are all saddling right up with me, makes the process feel even better! Hope you've all been doing well and to catch up with your journals soon. I'm off to spin, have a perfectly timed call with my health coach this afternoon, and will fill in with the house & book work that always awaits upon return home from a trip. But first as I get back to my routine & the tools that work so well, I'll begin in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious and express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of wonderful you, my family & IRL friends, a great trip with many wonderful memories of our time with DS, seeing him again in 10 days, a new day today to begin again re-enforcing what works for me and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(10 kommenttia)

25 syyskuuta 2014

Yes, my bags are packed and I'm roaring & ready to go… see my boy:)! I'm so excited as it's been almost 2 months since he moved away. As I'd warned DH, 2 months is my limit for the amount of time I can go between visits! We leave later this afternoon and return early on Mon, so have 3 full days with him -- yippee!

And, I'm feeling great going into his trip and happy with my healthy eating & living course. I've planned what I can to make it easier to stay on track, but will allow for flexibility to enjoy our time there.

I'm off to workout shortly as we don't leave for the airport until later this afternoon. I'll check in when I can on my travels, but have you with me always, and wish you all happiness and health this weekend too! So, now I'll start this one day of this one wonderful weekend with my boy in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, stay curious & express my way. I'm so very happy for each of loving & supportive you, my family & IRL friends, this wonderful weekend ahead with my boy and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(6 kommenttia)

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