Päiväkirja - Ruhu

Profiili - Ruhu | Painohistoria

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13 syyskuuta 2014

One good day seems to flow right into the next, & I couldn't be happier as I realize that the better I feel, the better I am able to take care of mom. So, yesterday, I rested when I needed after a bit more of a stressful start to that day as neither mom nor I slept well the night before. We had a nice lunch out though with one of my aunts and cousin, and then back for a nap for us both. I then had a great time last night with my girlfriend, godchild and her new baby. I went early to the shower they were having for her son's fiancé, and got to help out by holding the new baby girl. What a cutie with these gorgeous blue eyes! I couldn't have been happier. Not having any daughter, my god daughter's been my substitute and now her daughter is like a first surrogate grand child to me. It was a fun night, also including seeing my girlfriends family who I grew up with as well.

There were again a few times I could have chosen to eat yesterday when I truly wasn't hungry, but fatigued instead. But both times, I was able to recognize the fatigue and nap or go to bed instead. So, again I'm feeling really good about the progress there too. I also found myself at the wedding shower surprised by the food choices. While my friends are usually quite healthy eaters, the food offered were appetizers with limited options that wer gluten free. In hindsight, I should have eaten more before I went, but we are usually on the same page with what we eat, and I was taken by surprise. It worked out fine, even though I felt a bit anxious as I started to get really hungry and saw the options. Anyway, I avoided the carbage that can bring on cravings for more and ate some items that turned out to be very tasty, just not my usuals. It again made me realize that I can be too restrictive at times, and possibly expanding my choices may help me in the long run. The choices I made were higher fat items with some protein, and I'm wondering if the higher fat is what satisfied me to stop when I was full and not be tempted for more as the fatigue hit me coming home. Again, something for this lab rat to consider and experiment with, that maybe more fat would be more filling and satisfying, and keep those sweet cravings more at bay.

I try to generally try to eat low carb, no processed foods, but freely eat vegetables with some fruit. But, I've wavered wondering how much protein & fat to then round out my diet with. I know many now eat more low carb, high fat, but I've been more low carb, high protein. I'd love to hear what others have found as they make choices between protein and fat.

I'm off this morning to workout with my girlfriend at a class my goddaughter teaches. Then we're on to our favorite breakfast spot after. I'll come back to moms then, mass here and dinner out tonight with mom, another cousin and his wife. So another full day, but I should be back early after dinner, which will be nice. Ive been waking early here, like I had been at home, so if I can get to bed early, it makes for a more rested start to the day.

And start this day, I must, again praying for serenity. And through this one day and each one meal, moment, thought, bite and emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, stay curious and express my way. I'm so very grateful again for your never-ending love & support, my family & IRL friends, each day with my mom, how taking care of me has helped me better take care of mom, special time here with special friends, that beautiful new baby girl, and having the health and wealth to love this life I love! Xoxox

(3 kommenttia)

12 syyskuuta 2014

Another good day in Cincy:). The meetings with Moms nurse and dr appt yesterday, all went well, as did the meeting today with her social worker. While she has progressed some, she continues to function with assistance and clusters of bumps in the road. So we're in a holding pattern for now. The staff here and her dr agree that to move her now and take her away from my aunts and her friends here and the only home she's ever known, would be difficult and could really set her back. And, she said the same, when I brought it up to her. She agrees that if/when her health prevents her from getting out like she still does and enjoying her family & friends here, then we'll move her closer to me. I was fortunate to find a good time to speak with her about it when she was more with it than some other times. So, while with Alzheimer's things can change in a moment, I feel good having an idea of how we'll proceed from here,a dn knowing I've done my research in CT and know where I'd like her to move too if/when the time comes.

Mom & I are off to see my one of my aunts and cousin for lunch, and tonight I have a wedding shower for my best friend here's future daughter-in-law. And I'll get my hands on that new baby girl born just over a month ago to my godchild. So, another nice day ahead!

I'm happily continuing to do and feel great. I certainly have my moments, but have been able to work through them by staying curious and finding healthy ways to cope. Having each of you and our safe place here helps so much for I know you all are only a journal away. Writing is such great therapy for me... Especially knowing there's such kind support out there for me.

So off I go on another day which I'll start praying for serenity. And through this one day and each one meal, moment, thought, bite and emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, stay curious and express my way. I'm so very grateful for each of fantastic you, my family & IRL friends, this special time with my mom, spending time with my Cincy friends and that new baby especially, and having the health and wealth to live this life I love! Xoxox

(6 kommenttia)

11 syyskuuta 2014

Happy and healthy in Cincinnati! That's how I feel and how I'm working and planning for the time here to be, one day at a time. I had a wonderful reunion with my Mom. She was so happy to see me, show me off to her friends here and spend time together. She was very with it at times, and confused at others, but it was a good reunion non the less. Today, I'll meet with her nurse, then take mom to lunch and her dr. I'll know more about how much the Alzheimer's has progressed after today's appts and tomorrow's with moms social worker. She seems happy, and happily in denial about her memory issues. I choose not to press it, as I know it's how she copes.

And I'm feeling particularly good again, knowing I'm in such a better place myself than the past trips here since the Alzheimer's really took hold. It hit me again as I drove home from my workout this morning that taking care of me is really making it easier to take care of mom, and it's so cyclical as knowing I'm doing a good job with my mom makes me feel even better about who I am.

So, knowing who I am and the best way to start my day, I'll do so praying for serenity. And I'll pray, breathe, journal, stay curious and express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought and emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of wonderful you, all the love and support you shower on me always and especially on these more trying times, my family & IRL friends, being reunited with my mom, feeling good about me and that I'm doing my best taking care of mom, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! Xoxox

(7 kommenttia)

10 syyskuuta 2014

All my bags are packed, and yes, I'm ready to go and so excited to see my Mom, other family & friends back home. I'm feeling in such a better place than when traveling there in the past… healthier, happier, and better equipped to deal with whatever comes my way. I have my time there well organized and planned, and sent the itinerary to Mom ahead of time to ease her anxiety as the Alzheimer's takes away her ability to remember the details if I tell her alone. Having it in print has helped tremendously in the past, as does writing everything down for her. Most importantly while I'm there, I'll get a better idea of how much the disease has progressed to help me know when/if I should move her closer to me. We have an appt with her dr, and I'll meet with her nurse & social worker. Plus, we'll see my aunts & cousins, and I'll have time with my 2 close friends there too. My godchild, my best friend since kindergarten's daughter, had her first baby about a month ago. So, I'm also ecstatic to get my hands on that precious baby girl.

But now, I must get on my way, will check in when I can, but know I have your love & support with me along the way… which of course makes the trip easier too as I'll journal any emotions that arise that bring on cravings to eat emotionally. And like each day that I'm away, I'll start in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And, I'll pray, breathe, journal, log when I can, stay curious & express my way through this one day of this one trip and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of amazing you, my family & IRL friends, getting to see my Mom plus friends and other family back home, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(8 kommenttia)

09 syyskuuta 2014

My happy & healthy weekend of opportunities sets the stage well for me to travel and have many more opportunities to eat & live well while away and through the stress, emotions and transitions traveling and visiting my mom can bring. I leave tomorrow and return on Mon. I'm really excited to see my mom, aunts, cousins and friends out there. I've planned the time so that I have a nice mix of time alone with mom, time with mom and other family, time alone, time with my friends and time to take mom to her dr and meet with the staff at her assisted living facility. As mom progresses in her Alzheimer's, I'm never sure what I'll find as to mom's current state, the state of her apartment and her other needs, but I'll have my healthy and mindful toolbox with me to use as needed. And, I know I have you and your support every step of the way.

Today, I'm off to workout, then errands for the trip and back to prep the house for being away and pack. It'll be a busy time, but as I'm realizing, good busy can be a good thing for this gal. In building my healthy highway and experimenting to find the right route for me, I've realized that when I was less equipped to deal with stress and emotions (even good ones), I ate emotionally. Now that I'm better equipped, I'm happier and healthier with a balance of down time for me and social time with others, so Im learning to not fear the busyness and not automatically turn down invites and away from those who I just may enjoy and may be a good addition to my life. So, I'll again stay curious and open and do my best to continue to build new healthier and happier habits while traveling just as I'm doing at home… which means always starting my day in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

I'll continue praying, breathing, logging, journaling, staying curious and expressing my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought and emotion. I'm so very grateful for each of terrific you, my family & IRL friends, this continuing opportunity for health & happiness as I travel, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love, which now includes a trip to see my mom, other family and friends back home! xoxox

(5 kommenttia)

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